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Archive for April, 2010

What is a evidentiary affidavit?

April 30th, 2010 at 08:40 pm

Heard back from the lawyer, I think Yahoo has a lag. Anyway she is out of the office now. She emailed me back at 11am, but I was working on a project and so I did not check it until too late in the afternoon. She is probubly in court.

About 10 minutes ago WE signed everything BUT the evidentiary affidavit.

Not sure if we both needs to sign the Evidentiary Affidavit or just me or just the lawyer BUT I think I have to sign it from email traffic from my lawyer. Not really sure what the heck a evidentiary affidavit is either?

Okay the bad NEWS; not unexpected but still. Any corrections to the first draft (suppose to be perfect first try) get charged above the base $1000 plus filing $85 rate. It is a $250 per hour charge.

I had to have one rewrite of the original document AND the child support numbers had to be rerun plus rewritten into the Document TWICE because Military pay is TRICKY....Well Military pay for Part time Soldiers is even Trickier thus having to rerun STBX's income twice. Oh well I dont think running the child support numbers twice could have taken more than 30 minutes total. But who knows and they probubly have a charged in 15 minute incrament rule. I need to relook at the bill rate thing they sent me...I hope I made a copy of it before I sent it back to them signed.

Now I just have to hope and pray that everything makes it through the court system WITHOUT having to be rewritten again. I do not do well with $250 per hour add ons when I have no idea how much time is being spent.

I guess I will keep you posted on the cost of my suppose to be $1085.00 Divorce. Everywhere you go I always read that a divorce cost more than you plan so I guess I just hope it is not too much more than $1085.00.

Monday I will be turning in the signed papers, so everything should be ready to filed then.

Final Revision finished

April 30th, 2010 at 04:36 pm


I am SO Nervous....Nothing to be nervous about but I am none the less.

I recieved the corrected paperwork from the lawyer, it was in my email last night IF I had checked it once I got home, I could have gotten it back to her last night so she would have known first thing this morning. Oh well this works too.

STBX needed 2009 tax return for FAFSA, so I got the printed for him. I have been going through documents we will need such as tax return and dependant document (Birth Certificates and SS Cards) and printing two copies and getting them gathered up. I really did not want to give the tax return to him now because I have a feeling he will lose it but oh well I can always make another copy later.

So STBX reviewed the most recent revision and says that it is fine, He still is mystified by how the Child Support calculater works (I have no idea how it works either) I wish the form said okay subtract this from this then multiply that number using the percent in chart 123 table 8. But of course it does not. Why make it so everyone can understand it. I think if Custodal and Non-Custodal parents could go through the whole math of it then there would be less Child Support is screwing me additude. But since the papers were correct I email my lawyer back saying the papers were good and asked what the next step is.

I think it is pay her $500, they mail the documents to us or I pick them up and then return them to them, then pay $85 and they file them. Depending on what time they are printed I will either pick them up or have them mailed. If it is after 3pm then I will need to have them mail them. If they are ready after 3pm nothing is going to be able to be done with them until Monday.

Email back first draft of divorce papers

April 29th, 2010 at 02:22 pm

I sent back the first draft of the divorce papers. I will need to call the laywer and ask again about the payment.

I just do not want the process slowed down because they are waiting for payment...They have my CC Number and I just want them to use it if that is what is needed to keep the ball rolling.

I have the option of going down to pick up the papers and present them to STBX or to have them mailed and I think I am going to go down and get them. I want to make sure I have signed everywhere I need to sign before I hand them over to him for signature. Plus it cuts a day or 2 of the wait depending on time and date of them being done.

Yesterday he asked if he could have "Someones" look over the papers once they are done, I think he was asking if I thought they would do it. I said he could try asking; then he brought up the name of someone who he actually knows. I told him I would PREFER if he had her look them over before we resubmit them back to the lawyer and he said never mind. I offered twice and he said just send it back.

I really hope now he just signs them when the time comes...If we have another rewrite I have a feeling I am going to be paying $250 per hour for the modification. I am going to be a little miffed then because it would have been no extra cost IF he would have just done it before like I offered.

I guess it is wait and see....Today if the final draft is done and picked up then $500 Spent.

The morning gets BETTER.

April 28th, 2010 at 07:54 pm

I got the first draft of my divorce documents.

I say first draft because I needed to make a few changes, I am having the STBX look them over to make sure there is nothing in them he wants changed.

One big point was they messed up the Child Support Amount. I was like WOW when I saw the amount, but then I turned the page and was like WTF when I saw what they had as his per month net pay.

I went to the states website and ran the correct numbers. The amount is the exact same as what StepDaughter#2 Mother gets. The original number was almost double that amount. I told STBX the amount correct amount and of course he flipped out.

I told him we have options, I could either pay him for watching our son this summmer like I originally said I would, and since it is basically double dipping having him pay for Child Support AND half the household bills until he moves we could make an arrangement of one applying to the other. Also I said I am not sure that the CS is automatic or if we have to contact them, and They are always so slow anyway...If we dont do anything it might not happen until School starts (his income jumps once school starts). That calmed him down.

I want the paperwork done, I have no problem letting him mooch off me until School starts because it is best for Our little boy to get to spend time with his daddy and it does help me. Basically I look at it like hiring a nanny.

Man that would be AWESOME if we could get this all ironed out today and emailed back to the lawyer.

I am reading the documents and I think in our state since it is uncontested all that has to be done after it is signed is for it to be entered into record. That would be FREAKEN awesome if this could be done FAST!

Great Morning....

April 28th, 2010 at 03:26 pm

Today I stepped on the scale and stood there, sent a little prayer up above. Yeah when weight loss means job security for you and your son you bother god with little things like weight loss.

I looked down and 173.8 Wahoooo that is .8 above what I was when I was measured for work in Febrary. I am down 7.4 pounds since Friday, I also know this is not just water weight as I am always feel it when I lose weight in my back by my ribs.

I stepped off the scale and redid it because I wanted to MAKE Sure. Since I am .8 from my first goal, I am not sure if my next goal will be weight loss, inch loss, or body fat percentage loss. If we do not get weighed/taped at work this weekend than come monday morning I will get taped so that I can figure out what the next goal is.

Last night I Purchased another box of benefiber drink mix, this I think is so much better than pushing down fiber pills as #1 is helps with the water consummed, and #2 I hate pushing down fiber pills. I did not have a coupon for the benefiber, I lost my coupon organizers and could not find anything online. I am spending between $2 and $2.33 without coupon per day on benefiber to loss this weight. BUT since I lost 2 pounds yesterday SOOOO worth the $1 a pound.

I was able to find some coupons online after I got home from the purchase and I have two computer so I was able to print 4. My STBX has two computer that work, so I am hoping he will get the second one (needs a moniter) set up and I might be able to get four more coupons. One coupon lasts for 3 days worth of diet.

I was talking with a coworker, she is having someone remove some river rock from her yard, That person is also removing some from another persons home.

Well I am going to get the rock from BOTH for free and the person is delivering it to my driveway, all I have to do is spray it down with water to remove the dirt that has attached to the rock and I can put it into my empty rock gardens.

If I bought this at the store it would have been $2.97 per bag! Not sure how much rock it will end up being but more than one bag full. I hope to have enough to finish the side of the garage and the front of the house.

The same coworker who is having the rock removed so she can put in a flower bed gets the newspaper but does not use coupons. She agreed to bring them to me.

Wahoo What a good day.

5.4 pounds down since Friday AM 32.8 to go!!!

April 27th, 2010 at 05:15 pm

Okay realistically I dont know if I will get down to 143. I technically need to get to 149 in order to avoid being taped to see if I am under 34% body fat.

2008 July I was about 150-155 pounds and toned (lots of swimming) I would like to be there again. I have until Dec 5th to make this happen. Once this happens I an extending my Job contract for 6 years.

Yep Job security for me and my son for 6 years, So worth a little discomfort now. I have been good and drinking 10-11 glasses of water a day, taking my diet pills and counting calories.

I have desided I am going to bite the bullet and buy more benefiber drink mix (keeps me full) even though I have some raspberry tea flavor at home. The raspberry tea flavor makes me gag. The cost of it as as a diet aid is worth it when you consider it is helping me keep a 50K job a year in a 18K a year average area. Just wish I could find my coupon file since I am sure I had some benefiber coupons in there.

House Update
Door is to be installed tonight. Countertops sometime this week (the counter is at the store with the install team - just need install team to call to set up a time).

Laywer - no news yet.


Three days until payday. Need to balance the checkbook. Bought my son some jeans on clearance that I need to return to the store. They are "Rocker" style AKA basically skinny cut jeans for men. I figured they would not be bad as he normally wears slim jeans. HA the butt looks like he is wearing a diaper and the tightness in the legs/length looks like he should be a host on that show "Q--- eye for the straight guy".

Oh well I am hopeing to get a trip into Once upon a child so I can see if I can get him some bigger jeans. It is hard finding him SALE/Clearance/Used jeans because he needs an adjustable waist (needs a belt because he is super skinny; but cant wear a belt due to medical issues) and he wears slims while Short and HUSKY is the standard wear I live. If he wears nonslim jeans the waist does not get tight enough with the adjustable waist and when he jumps etc the jeans fall down to his shoes.

Have a great day!!

Spending and life Update including 529 Account.

April 26th, 2010 at 05:40 pm

On Friday I had that light bulb moment....

Everytime I have successfully lost weight and kept it off for a while I have
#1 took a diet pill
#2 Counted Calories
#3 drank at least 8 glasses of water a day.

Well Friday I went to the store and picked up some SlimQuick. I am liking it so far. I really like how I feel less tired. I was looking through the information and I noticed the appitite supressent is a differnet/additional product. So I went back to the store to pick some up since I have that problem.

Well Wal-Mart did not have it BUT CVS did. CVS had a label on another SlimQuick product that said in small print ALL slimquick Product. The Label/Tag was Buy one get one 50%. So when it did not ring up that way I asked and after a little wait I got my 50% off.

I am down 2.4 pounds since starting the pills and appetite supressent. I am down 3.4 pounds since Friday Morning!!!

The appetite supressent drink mix Tastes NASTY!!! No wonder it is everywhere on EBAY. I have decided to use it once a day only as the pre dinner item because I get SO hungery then I could eat a horse. This means I will have enough for 27 days. Hopefully by then my stomich will shrink and I will not be as hungry. So I will not have to buy more.

I need to buy more of the pills though. I will be checking for coupons and sale prices. I just bought the first bottle on Friday so I have some time before I need to buy more I just want to get it purchused before I run out so I can save $$$.


I have been drinking my 8 glasses of water a day, actually I am at 10-11 so I am in the bathroom like a pregnant lady.


Counting calories...Yep I am doing it. I am eatting the same thing for breakfast everyday, then lunch is soup, then dinner is a meal that changes. By repeating the breakfast, and lunch it makes it easier to do the calories....You just figure it out once and you are good.

Today the countertop people called, so hopefully we should be getting it installed this week. Tomorrow the guy is installing the door upstairs.

This means that all I have to finish on the house is staining the front steps...Oh it snow this morning. So I need to wait now. Got to love the weather.

I want to pick up some rocks for around the house. It will depend on how long it takes to sell the house but I would like to atleast pick up enough for the front of the house and the side by the garage.

My STBX is freaking out about the house not selling. Now he has forgotten that the Realtor said most houses are selling in 80 days and instead has in his head that she promised before the end of April (she said she hoped the Tax credit might prompt an FAST sell).

We have a Open House last night and 10 couples came to see the house. I bought my son new shoes since the seams at the toes of his other were torn. $25 total after tax, I could have gotten cheaper if I would have went to the mall or Wal-MArt but he Loved these since they are like his Daddy's.

No news on the Divorce Front...Well Actually last Thursday I sent back the form that says I agree to the fees. So hopefully that will be done soon. My STBX is running up his Credit Card...He is charging Alcohol and tabacco and getting cash advances to buy those things. He is spending an average of $20 a day. I should just not worry about it BUT part of me worries that at the last minute I am going to have to deal with it.

Today the disk drive on his laptop is stuck. He has two desktops, one that works and one that needs repairs. So his answer to the laptop is he plans to go to Wal-MArt and buy a new one with his credit card and throw the old (1.5 years old - desert conditions) across the room.

Whatever.......I really need to not worry about his issues BUT I am playing the What if game. What IF he doesn't sign the papers and wants me to pay off half his credit card bill. (In his Name Only and Charging Nothing of value.)
I stopped putting money into the 529 account for me son. I then changed the deposit allication for new deposits. WHY because once we sell the house and deposit the sales from the house It will be invested as a seperate investment fund, that way the money from US is seperate from MY $. Once the House $ is deposited I will then change the allication back to the prior funds and I will put new MY $ deposits into the other fund.

That way IF something happens and I need to use MY money for Me for College it is seperate from the Joint $ for Little Boy. I have also desided for the time being that I am not going to put anymore money into the college fund. I have a option that might open up in the future to finish funding it so for now I will use the money for other goals.

Running Budget Numbers AGAIN! Budget Questions

April 21st, 2010 at 08:17 pm

Here is my Zero Based Budget:

Expenses: Monthly
Mortgage / Rent $1,060.00
MDU $126.50
Water/Waste $56.90
Cell $96.16
Internet $38.11
House Downpayment$0.00
Storage Unit $55.00
Phone $29.17

Dental Premium $12.69
Dependent Meds $15.00
Braces Fund $150.00 (Savings)
Dental Work Bills$25.00 (Slush)

Daycare $165.00
Weekend Sitter $100.00
Summer Daycare $175.00 (Slush)

Lumina Gas $50.00
Insurance $33.16 (Slush)
Tags $17.00 (Slush)
Lumina Repairs/Replace $100.00 (Savings)

School lunch $37.50
School Snack $6.66
Clothes $20.00
Gifts- Xmas/Bday$50.00 (Slush)
College 529 Fund$20.00 (Savings)
Back 2 School Items$45.00 (Slush)
Allowance $8.00

Food/Cleaner/Etc $200.00
Gifts- Xmas/Bday/Wedding$10.00 (Slush)
Roth IRA $416.66 (Savings)

Total $3,118.51 SHORT 664.53

Work $2,453.98
Child Support ???

Slush Fund $355.16
Downpayment Fund $0.00
New Car / Car Repairs $100.00
Braces Fund $150.00

I am $664.53 Short to keep up with my finacial goals so changes need to be made. First note I do not know how much I would get for Child Support BUT it will be small as my STBX income is $1195 per month if they do not include the $705 non-taxable income he earns. I want my budget to be based off no child support so if for some reason he cant pay and his amount goes to arrears that I am not in a bad situation.

I am trying to follow a Dave Ramsey type program. I want to create a slush fund for bills that are not monthly such as back to school clothes and supplies, gifts, car insurance and car tags etc.

I would like to save for a downpayment or house purchase in the future and so that is a savings item. I would like to save for College for my Son, I would like to save for Braces for him, I also want to save for retirement.

What do you think?

I know the storage unit HAS to go (And will as soon as the house is SOLD), the grocery/cleaning/etc is a total estimate and I am selling the house and would like to put the difference between my current housing cost and rental cost into savings for a downpayment. I am guessing the difference is going to be $500.

If this was your budget would you?
A. Reduce the savings that is going to the downpayment on a house ($500)
B. Reduce/Stop the saving for Son's College ($20)
C. Reduce Roth IRA savings ($416.66)
D. Combination
E. Other ??

Question 2 I bought my STBX an new phone which I signed a 1 year contract for, I can either
A. Cancel line pay $200 Fine
B. Change plan to a smaller plan and pay extra $10 or $20 (depends on plan) until Dec 2010 and keep the phone plan no cancel fee
*** B is cheaper BUT then I have a second line to deal with. I upgraded both phones at the same time so I cant just take over his number and cancel my number.
WHAT would YOU do?

Ouch this is going to be expensive - DIET!!

April 20th, 2010 at 03:49 pm

Okay stepped on the scale....179pounds.

Yes instead of being nice to me the scale is being MEAN!! It was suppose to magically turn to 143 pounds.

I guess all that resterant eatting because we have to leave the house so people can see the house and so that we are not cooking and messing up the house is messing up my waist line.

So Tomorrow is the work BBQ, that is the last day before I go back on my diet.

I am going to hit it hard, I am stopping off at the diet center and buying the detox drugs...Yep that is between $75 and $90 for a month. Then I plan on stopping at the grocery store and buying some fruit since I already have the meal replacement shakes (I want to add juice and fruit for flavor).

I have two bottles of the meal replacement already(one for at work and one for home) they are 15 meals per bottle, you are suppose to replace 2 meals with the shakes and then eat sensible the third meal. So a bottle is 2 weeks. Well I need to stop eatting all together. I need to totally stop the garbage that I am putting in my body so I will be doing three shakes a day with the added fruit and fruit/vegtables as snacks to get to my needed calories and then hopefully after my cravings end and stomich shrinks in size (full faster) I can stop the meal replacement and go back to cooking meals.

One thing I do know is if I stay out of the kitchen I eat less so the quickness of the meal replacement might be worth the money.

Hard Work, Free DoorBell, Being a Kid

April 19th, 2010 at 02:13 pm

This weekend I worked my tail off on Friday. Of course I still need to seal the wood of the front porch.

I might do that tonight. I needed to let the wood dry out after washing it (twice) and sanding it. Yesterday I noticed dirty shoe prints on the deck after the wash job so I will need to sweep/sand those off (no water) then seal the deck.

I think the reason the stain/seal was not lasting was in years past I was rushing the stain/seal after the cleaning off of the old product and the first year I think the problem was we did not clean the wood to make sure there was not any kind of product on it.


After cleaning the front porch I painted the trim around the doors; it looks real nice. We went out to buy a new door bell. Once we got home we noticed the holes in the siding from the old bell were spaced farther apart then the new bell. So went to a different store and same deal. Which means we had to go back to the overpriced place that we picked our lights etc out back in Fall 2006. We closed on our house in Feb 2007. Not sure when the light bell got installed so the doorbell is a little over 3 years old. It still works it is just that the button has a hole in it like the plastic just disinigrated. Since it looked terrible we wanted to get it fixed as it is a eye sore upon entering the house.

I went into the store and explained that we closed on our house in Feb 2007 and was wonder what there warrenty was on the door bells. We explained how it seemed like the door bell button just disinigrated. I was not expecting anything but figured I would try. The floor guy went to ask the big boss and said before leaving to ask her that usually it is a year warrenty but he might be able to do a 30% discount. He came back after a while and said that they would give us the replacement FREE but they needed the old bell.

So we drove home took the door bell off and my son and I returned to the store to get the new one. We had a white door bell that actually looked a little cream now BUT they were out even the display model was gone so we ended up with a silver one. Oh well FREE is FREE and I think the bling of the silver adds a nice touch to our front door which feels a little plain at this time. All in all we probubly spent $.50 in gas and got a FREE doorbell. Now I just have to return the door bell we had originally bought at a hardware store. Regular price of door bell $19.97 @ overpriced lighting store which we got for free because we asked about a warrenty.

This Saturday we had one showing. I think the STBX is getting nervous as time goes on because I think he is secretly wishing that it will sell in April because then he can move out of state faster. The school he wants to attend keeps asking if he wants to start sooner because they have openings. He told me they say it is easier to get a earlier date and not a later date so he is locked into August BUT if we sell the house earlier he could move earlier. STBX promised to watch DS this summer but I have a feeling I am going to be putting him into daycare this summer. I cant really blame him for wanting to start early after all if he does then he does not have to get an apartment here if we sell before August. It just sucks because as usual I am the one having to scrabble to make everything work.

Today we have two showings.

I guess I do not have a preferance when it comes to selling the house. When we sell I will move into an apartment and my housing expenses will go down by about $600 per month. When we sell STBX will move out of state and depending on when that happens then come summer I will need to pay for fulltime summer daycare $500+ per month which is a $335 increase since right now my afternoon care cost is $165. Also once he moves our electric will go down because he runs his computer and all his electronics 24/7 and even forgets to turn off the TV.

I think my food costs will go down also since while he was gone we averaged $50 a week including resterants and now we are averaging $150 in groceries alone.

So if you do the math it is still cheaper and the stress of everything will be less, I just wish that my little boy could have a fun free carefree summer. I think I am going to be enrolling him in the summer school program 8am-12noon (FREE) then figure out a afterschool program for the rest of the day. It is three weeks a month for June and July so I could actaully take vacation the other week. Then I think I could enroll him in the all day August program at the place he goes to now afterschool.

This just makes me a little sad as I really just wanted my little boy to get a summer of going to bed late, sleeping in late, riding his bike, playing with kids and not having to be stuck in a classroom from 8am-noon.

I need to start clearing out the storage unit, since we have desided what STBX wants as his property. Maybe I can talk to my grandmother about a rummage sale in May. I wonder if there is time for a small one this Weekend at her house since we have the open house this weekend.