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Temporary Buyers remorse, and Change of Retirement Savings

July 14th, 2010 at 06:51 am

Well I went back to the store and bought the furniture for upstairs. In 1 to 2 weeks I should have furniture for my house. Later that evening as I was thinking of the total bill I started to regret it.

I got a great deal on the furniture, I really do need furniture as it makes it hard to sit down and relax when you only have wood kitchen chairs to sit down in. But being the tight wad that I am I have a hard time spending money on myself.

Truthfully this is the first Me Purchase I have made in well 11 years. The last Me Purchase was my Car in 1999. I guess I am stressing because I charged it to my credit card and unless I want to pull the $ out of savings about half the charge might sit one cycle on the CC. Of course my rate is 8% so that is not bad considering. But as a pay in full credit card person this extra month freaks me out.


I would like to have a fully funded 12 Month EF, truthfully I do not need that much as my job is really secure but it makes me feel better.

Today I reduced my retirement savings from 36% of my pay to 15%. This will bring me about an extra $700 per month into my take home. I plan to use the extra money to fund the Emergency Fund, The House Payment Fund and The Escrow Fund. (Basically I have the Emergency Fund broken down three ways) I figure if something were to happen then why breakup the fund to those three things when I can just break them up now.

Once the Emergency Funds are funded I need to save for the Deck and for a larger house repair fund. The Deck is a Need as it is a safety thing. I have a walk out lower level so without the deck if there was a fire at the front of the house the only way out the top floor would be the two story windows. The house repair fund is currently being fed $100 per month. I would like at least $2000 in the account. The deductible on the homeowners insurance is 1000 and I want to have atleast 1000 for repairs.

Once that all happens then I will raise back my retirement savings. It really hurts to reduce my retirement saving BUT truthfully if I continue how I am saving for retirement I will have $50K per year income and I am currently living off of $29K per year with the mortgage payment so I should not be stressing.


I hope to have a rummage sale this weekend to help pay for the furniture and to also reduce the clutter in my life.

I was trying to think of ways to increase my income. I could get a parttime job (but this would require permission from my employer). I could sell stuff, which is why I am having a rummage sale/sales. Or I could think about having a roommate or two. I am not ready to go the roommate route because I like being able to live my life without having to worry about noise from other. Also if I get a parttime job I would have to line up daycare. So I am not sure what I will do for extra money once I sell everything that I can sell.


Hopefully I will get clearity as time goes on, I just feel so pulled in so many ways.

Waiting for the Refinance Payment to hit, Bought Furniture

July 13th, 2010 at 06:45 am

I am waiting on my Refinance Payment to hit my old mortgage company. There was a 3 day "Change your Mind" window with the loan which means I signed paperwork after hours on Monday so I had until Friday the 9th at Midnight to notify the lender if I desided I no longer wanted the loan.

Well Midnight on Friday translates to nothing happening until first thing on Monday. So I am checking my online mortgage account waiting for the payment to post or for me to try to log in and for it to tell me I no longer have an account.


I need furniture, it is very difficult to entertain anyone when the only furniture you have is the kitchen table chairs and or the bedroom beds. So I finally broke down and went to the furniture store to purchase the livingroom set that I had desided I was going to purchase.

When I go there I realize to my dismay that the set I picked out that I thought had attached cushions infact did not have attached cushions. Sorry but I hate when a couch does not have attached cushions and you have a wiggly child on the couch and before you know it you are leaning against the back of the couch between the cushions.

So after a trip around the show room I had 3 options, the set that I am planning to purchase for the upstairs livingroom, a set very similar to the set I had selected originally but more $$ and with hard arms, and a third set that was not in their catalog.

I actually went with the third option, the couch was smaller than I was planning (only 2 inches larger than the one I plan to buy for the upstairs). But I LOVE the microsued fabric. It was also the BEST price. This store that I went to is always the best priced, so there stuff is hardly ever on sale more than their regular price.

Well they were comping this set because a local store had a similar set on sale so I got a couch, loveseat, chair and ottoman for $1100 plus a discounted delivery fee. That is $600 less than what I would have paid for the original set and the ottoman was basically a freebee. Actually they threw in a fabric protector package also for the sale price listed but since I would not have paid extra for it I did not include that in the price calculation.

Last night as I was sleeping or trying to sleep I got to thinking, I need furniture for the upstairs livingroom also. I was going to wait as this is a want not a NEED. But I can get a couch, chair, and ottoman for the price I would pay for just the sofa I was going to buy for the upstairs because of the comp PLUS since I already paid the reduced delivery fee why not buy the upstairs stuff now and save the second delivery fee.

Buying now would save me $300 PLUS the delivery fee. And the furniture upstairs would match the furniture downstairs so I think the house would flow very nicely. So later today I am going to go back to the store and add the upstairs pieces to me order.

That is so awesome that for the price I planned to pay for just my basement furniture I will have gotten all the furniture I need.


This weekend I plan to have a rummage sale. I hope it goes well because I really want to get rid of some of the clutter in my house.

A catch up

July 6th, 2010 at 01:19 pm

Okay lets see. XH moved out on the 1st of the Month, came back on the 2nd for the holidays then left on the 5th until the 22nd when he is bringing back DS from their visit.

I gave him a BUNCH of furnature and as a result I have no couch, but I figured it saved me the hassle of finding someone to take the livingroom set to the dump once I saved up enough money to buy new furnature.

I bought a new (softer) mattress, what a difference that has made. My XH always thought he NEEDED a firmer mattress so I listed my old one on a online site for free and it was picked up within 4 hours.

I need to step on the scale and see where I am at for weight. I passed the physical fitness and body fat requirement for work so today I signed a NEW 6 year contract with my employer.

Yesterday my relatives were all saying that I looked like I lost weight and a co worker who had not seen me in a week said the same thing. I think now that my stress level has gone down the weight is coming off.

I set up autofunding of all my savings goals. I am kind of stressing because after all is done I only have like $600 per month for things like food, gas and unexpected. I am trying to plan for as many non-routine expenses but there is always the unplanned that pops up. I have my 3MTH Emergency Fund completed and am $1300 short of 6MTH.

Tonight I close on my house refinace. So as of tonight I will offically be a homeowner all by myself without my XH on the title. We did a quit claim but the refinace will make it 100% offical as when they were doing the title search they had to have XH sign some more documents so I am glad I refinaced so all the i s are dotted and t s are crossed.

The big summer work rush happened, not sure if I wrote about that but my now single status was the thing to talk about. As a result I am now dating someone.

I got the garage opener back from my XH, but forgot to get the key because he threw a little drama in my lap as he drove away on the 5th. Oh well I am not looking forward to spend the money to change the locks BUT I did want to put a more decorative handle/lock on the door so now I have a good reason to push that to the top of the to do list.

The guy I am seeing has a cousin that builds decks, so he is going to talk to him and see if he can get me a deal on the construction of one. I need a deck, it is not just a want because it is an exit. It is a FIRE escape if there is a fire at the front of the house or in the garage.

I currently have $100 a month going into a house repair and projects account, Once I have my Escrow account funded, my mortgage account, and my 6MTH EF funded to where I want them, I want to bump that up so that I can build the deck sooner.

I am slowly going through the house and I so need to have a rummage sale. I need the money and I need to clear some of this junk because I want to declutter my life.

I had some rocks and a boulder in my back yard the boulder weighed 4600 pounds. I paid a coworker to remove them. The total cost was 326.80 for the work and now once the grass grows in I will be able to mow the grass without having to mow around the rocks. It is a huge weight off my shoulders....Like 4600 pounds. HaHa

Financing my home! The Buy OUT!

June 3rd, 2010 at 07:06 am

Yesterday I spoke with XH and he agree to let me buy him out of the house.

My XH is very self centered and a instant gratification kind of person. (Truthfully he was hoping to list and have an offer in the first week) Even though our house is over the average price for a home in city (169K).

So....I have refinanced the house in my name only. I was approved to refinance anyway. Now I am waiting for the company to Fed-Ex me the paperwork which I will review and sign and return and then THE CLOSER will call me. Due to back log I am told this can take 5 days. But I am locked in on the new rate and it is 1.5% LESS than what I am at now so my total payments will go down $150 per month. Also I will not have an escrow anymore (I will be doing a self-escrow).

Once the house is refianced then I will be paying my XH 10K which is what he would have gotten had we sold the house at the REAL VALUE price AFTER the realtor fees and the portion to Myself and to DSs college fund. We will be doing a Quit Claim Deed to transfer all ownership to myself and to BUY him out. Actually the 10K is $1,500 or 7% more than he should be getting BUT it is what his "I need this amount to move on was".

I would have liked this as an option before we divorced so we could have gotten it taken care of with that instead of having to do a quit claim deed NOW but my XH usually has to be given time to come to realize that I am right.

See he thought our house was worth 260K NO way I was going to pay him 50% of equity of that. I knew it was closer to 206K well we met with a RE Agent and the house is listed at 214 (Big difference in Equity from his minds idea)....NO bites no nibbles. So house is not selling and people complaining about this that and the red neck neighbor with 10 cars three which are parked on the grass and he FINALLY realizes we are going to have to be at a break even point NOT a huge flip that house profit (finished the basement) to sell the house.

So basically we are now both at a house value point that is REAL and because he understands that if we sold to split the profit we would have to pay a realter so that is going to be factored OUT of the equity for both of us. I feel bad that he thinks he should get more than what the market is going to bring him. BUT on the other hand when I called back and told him that I got approved he was releaved. He told me all day after that it was like a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders.

The funny thing is there is still some work for me to iron out, so at times there is still a little stress on my plate. But last night I played outside with my son, we rode his scooter and he rode his bike and then would take a turn on his scooter. It was great and it was all possible because FINALLY I am done spending all my spare time keeping the house OCD clean.

This morning I took a shower in the Master Bathroom. The Main floor bathrooms have been off limits for a while now since I super cleaned them and put out NEW towels and rugs. Last Night I BBQed But if I had wanted to I could have used the kitchen again. We were limiting cooking and doing alot of take out so that we could reduce the cleaning required. SOOOOOO Nice.

Will I get approval to buy MY house??

June 2nd, 2010 at 11:51 am

Met with the stagers today. $4000 to stage the house and they said about $150 per month since we would need to rent a livingroom set for upstairs..

So following that I....

Sat down with XH to show him how much he would net IF he went with his bottom line that he agreed to before going to the concert. He thought man we definately have to pay to stage now because that is not enough. To which my answer was even if we pay to stage there is NO garentee we will sell and what price we will get.

So after that I asked "How much do you NEED to be able to move on?" Well it turns out it would be 47% of his bottome price.

I am on hold!!!!!

I am looking to refinance our home and then buying him out with a quit clam deed. That EF over there is going to take a nose dive though since I do not want to finance the buy out into the mortgage. I think it is best for everyone.

Little Guy and me get to stay in the family home and XH gets the $ he needs to move out of state. If I refinance #1 I no longer need to have the taxes and insurance in escrow so I will make interest on the money for the escrow that I will keep in a seperate savings account. #2 because of the refiniance my payments will drop by $150 per month. They will drop by $410 per month if you remove the escrow. The NEW total price means the house is only going to cost me about $100-$200 per month more than I was looking to spend for an apartment. Also my mortgage will stay the same instead of changing yearly based on taxes and insurance amounts.

I have my fingers crossed.

How much is your SANITY worth $$$$$

June 1st, 2010 at 09:47 am

So XH got back from his out of town party with friends.

He of course gets upset right away when I ask him to make sure his feet are clean before walking on the NEW carpet. The old carpet was dirty and that is why we had to spend $500 to replace it so people would stop complaining about the carpet.

Well before the trip I was working on the rock border and he was painting the upstiars. Well while he was gone I finished the rock border. I have a stiff neck, sunburned arms, and 4 days I will never get back to show for it BUT it is done.

Today when he called me at work to find out if I called the realtor I mentioned the painting. He still needs to paint the hallway and the two bathrooms. (The bedrooms should also be done but they are not BAD). His answer was to swear at me then hang up the phone. I really dont get the sell it two months ago attitude but yet I am doing all the work to get it ready to show.

I have called the realtor so far today twice. I will talk to her today BEFORE 9pm. I want to find out about the comments during the last open house. I also plan to reduce the price we are asking.

It is costing me 1500.00 in housing payments for each additional month we are on the market because XH has not money and now he is getting hystrical because in a month he will not have enough to pay his child support in full. (Humm maybe he should work instead of taking vacations or get a fulltime job).

We are talking of dropping our list price. I am thinking about 10K but it might be 15K just to get a QUICK bite. XH wants to drop it to 200K but then in the same sentence he says he wants a small amount of money so he can move and start living his life. We might end up at the 15K drop which would be 199K but It scares me a bit because then the offers are going to be below that price and I know XH is going to be a pain in the BUTT when he doesnt have much to move forward.

I talked to the realtor and off course now a third realtor has repeated that our house is great but it is not selling. Now the word is the house is COLD. The new homes we are up against are staged and painted a warm browny/tan and we have near white walls.

The realtor knows some stagers and hopefully they can come over tomorrow to look at the house. Of course I knew this needed to be done and any painting suggested is going to have to be hired out (XH is lazy but at end of rope). When I told him the house might need to be painted a warmer color he flipped out and said he cant afford any more house expenses. I am really getting sick of him saying that because I am the one footing all the bills.

Oh well how much is my sanity worth, is it worth dropping my house price by 15K and paying out of pocket 1K for painting and ??? 1K for furnature and decorations to warm up the place.

Sadly I just wish we would have priced the house lower to start with. I was thinking based on pricing that would should have been at 206K to start. If we would have started there then took of 5K for the deck allowance we might have sold faster and it would not be JUNE and still not sold the house.

Shopping this weekend! $$$

May 24th, 2010 at 10:08 am

This weekend we went shopping for carpet.

Looking over the instock supplies; XH was set on a certain type and color of carpet the sales lady was suggesting which was $2.29 per SF. I had pointed out that I prefered a totally different type and a mixed color instead of solid one which was $1.19 per sf.

He was stuck on the carpet at $2.29, until we got the quote. $714. He wanted to go to another store or two and so we left and on the way out he said okay maybe we will go with the $1.19 per sf carpet. I truthfully had been hopeing to get the carpet installed and all for around $300 so the $1.19 per sf is much closer to that price than the $2.29 stuff.

I guess it helps that I have purchased carpet with my grandmother many times and know that the price per sf adds up fast!

This is the same place he went to to get the molding for the upstairs bath that he was charged $60 a piece for. Really!!

We had went to my prefered store next. XH and I met with someone and talked about our needs, he suggested not only instock but figured out how much carpet we would needed and suggested a remenet piece. Being XH was about price at this point we picked out an piece and when it was all done it was about $424.

I am not sure the exact price because XH paid for it. Which was nice that he paid since I purchased the replacement garbage disposal and paid the plumber to fixed the water line for the dishwasher the day after we had the countertops installed.

The nice thing is this guy was the real deal, he made sure to ask about all the add ons. We ended up going home and measuring doorways because we needed to fix the transition of the lamenet. Which by the way is $30 there per piece!

We ended up having to go back because XH missed measuring out the landing at the foot of the stairs and he said it was like a foot and I was sure it was more. When we got home the landing was closer to 2 feet. We ended up having to go with a larger piece of remnent but it was an easy process and the price different of going from 12 x 10 to 12 x 14.6 was actually only $29.00.

The first piece was a berbur, the second was a pile but not a cheap pile, the thin little curly q type pile. Actually the store had it in wierd diagnal cuts of different colors at the front of the store so it must be popular. I want to say it reminds me of a shag rug. Maybe it is shag carpet.

Anyway the carpet we got was almost identical to what we had except the type. The carpet on the stairs will be removed and the carpet will be laid down on the stairs and the hallway this friday.

Saturday evening I went shopping, I got propane for the gas grill. I am hopeing that we can grill more so that #1 we will not be using the stove inside (so kitchen stays clean). #2 we can cut back on the number of meals we are eatting out to minimize the mess to the kitchen.

I then went to Wal-Mart, I finally found some shorts. I went in hoping to buy another pair of jeans but they were out of my size and I could not find jean shorts that fit like I wanted. BUT I found workout shorts, I have been looking long and hard. I am picky about my workout shorts...I do not like them too short and I like them to look flattering but it seems like either they are tight like spandex or they are more relaxed and they ballon out below the thigh.

I found 7 pairs of capris that fit just like I wanted and they were on clearance from $11 to $5 each. I bought all seven pairs because when I find something that works I need to stock up and seven pairs is one weeks worth or shorts. I also got a Tank which was regular price $11 but Marked $5 but rang up $1.

Sunday I went shopping with DS I wanted to see if I could find more tanks, I had been looking at the $5 racks after trying it on in the fitting room and after getting home and looking at the reciept I realized I should have been looking at the $1 rack.

Sunday I bought a St. Joseph Statue, I bought DS three sets of shorts and tanks they were $7 each and I bought him a pair of flip flops $4, and a pair of canvas slip on shoes $1 clearance. I found myself another tank but it was $5.

DS might not really have needed the tank/short sets BUT I am not sure. I think his summer stuff is in the tote in his bedroom closet but I might have taken his summer stuff over to the storage unit. Either way the tank and shorts end up $3.50 per piece since they could be worn seperately so for that price it is not bad.

These were the last ones in his size, so If I would not have gotten them they would have been gone when I went back. He wears size 7 slim pants with adjustable waist BUT in shorts wears 4/5 (skinny waist). So I bought them and after I go through the tote in his room and IF he has a ton of clothes for summer I might return them.

So this weekend was alot of spending but not too bad, I did not buy furnature so $1500 less than I planned.

Bought Rugs and Flowers

May 20th, 2010 at 08:55 am

Last Night I bought two rugs...

7.5 feet by 9.5 feet was $62.00
5 feet by 8 feet was $50.00

The large one is now upstairs, we are going to be moving the loveseat and automan from the basement onto it and then making a little reading/lounging area. The LARGE rug brings out the size of the room. I guess the realtor told XH we needed a rug with a bold design to draw people to the rug but I was not told that and I got one that has a pattern but it is a solid color. The Rug is huge, so it draws the eye, and brings out the size of the room while still reducing the vastness of the laminent floors.

The second rug is a very nice pattern and it is downstairs infront of the sliding door. I would have loved it if I could have gotten it in a bigger size but the huge rugs were either solid or they had one multicolor which I actually thought looked Cheap so I went with the solid.

I moved the rugs that were in front of the washer/dryer and the sliding door and put them in the hall. So I dont need to buy any more rugs!

So Saturday we will just move furnature and order carpet for that stairs and the hallway. Much Cheaper than buying a livingroom set.
I bought flowers....$56.00

I planted voilas infront of the front steps, then DS picked out two planters for the front steps.

The planters have a Large pink/redish garanimum in them and some drappy blue flowers. They are really nice (he has a thing for garanimums), I dont like garagniums but I do like this planter setting. They came with nice sqaure pots that are a complementary color for the house and were only $8 each.

I then bought 4 pink lilies that were starting to open, and 3 purple lisper (I think that is what they are called). I alternated them in front of the front windows, so now the blooming flowers are in front and the tiger lilies that are returning from last year which are not popping flowers up yet are behind it adding a little green.

I worked some more on the rock boarder, XH plans to take DS fishing Saturday after the carpet is ordered. I plan to work tonight, tomorrow night and then finish the rock border on Saturday. It will be alot of work BUT I want to finish so I can post a picture on here so you can see the improvements.

I also want to shampoo the carpet on saturday, we have another open house on Sunday.

Had an unoffical showing last night. An older couple was crusing around while I was working on the flowers and they asked about the house. I think they were scoping out the site for the open house this Sunday. I offered to let them look and I walked them through. They liked the house and his wife LOVED our kitchen but we dont have a upstairs laundry.

I need to take some measurements. I know our washer and dryer can be stacked and could be installed in our master walk-in. (The closet is right over the mechanical room, and it could be vented out through the attich, but that would cut down on Master Bedroom closet space.
Option #2 would be putting it in the closet off the entry. I have to measure but I think the closet could be slightly extended out into the entry. Or the closet could be deepend by extending the closet by doing a little add on.

Of course option #1 would be by far the cheapest. Plus the house as tons of closets plus the storage in the basement so I think the small loss of space by putting an additional stacked washer/dryer in the master closet would be minimal. Also if it was an smaller washer/dryer on the main floor (the regular on the basement for big stuff or visitors) I think it could work.

I will definately take some measurements and get some quotes so that we could put that out as an option IF we keep getting the older couples that want laundry on the main floor.

The Saturday shopping adds up more....

May 19th, 2010 at 10:16 am

So now we have another open house this Sunday, so besides the rug I had planned to purchase to cover the floor in the upstairs family room, I was told I should purchase a rug for the downstairs floor and a runner for the hallway until we put down the carpet.

I am thinking of taking the rug in front of the basement sliding door and putting that back up stairs into the entry way walkway. I was thinking since I had two that match that I could put in the hallway downstairs BUT I think we need one long Heavy runner. We will see once I take some measurements and see what I can find that is HEAVY!

I really do not want to buy a ton of rugs since I will not need them one we move. My realtor has one we could barrow BUT I am I would prefer not too since if it does get messed up (showings are while we are gone) then I would feel required to replace it. I am not sure the retail but I would prefer buying something in my price range.

So far Saturday is:
Couch $597
Chair $398
Automan $272
Rug 8 x 10 or larger
Rug 8 x 10 or larger
Large Runner ??? (for hallway) or a small runner (infront of washer/dryer) take current w/d rug to pair with matching one in front of sliding door place in hallway

Carpet (for stairs and hallway plus installation)

Then since we have a showing sunday but carpet will not be fixed I need to shampoo carpet before Sunday.

Wish I could pass some of these expenses onto XH But of course he has NO money, he NEEDs to look for a job so that if the house does not sell before school starts he can still put down on a down payment of course he is not thinking about that. Not sure why I am worrying about it. If he is not willing to get a job now he will have to make due. If we have to buy three rugs to sell our house he should buy atleast one. Maybe he can use it in his new apartment. I will think about having him buy one.

The floors are clean but still have a few streaks...$$$$

May 18th, 2010 at 12:07 pm

so the cleaning lady suggested we buy an area rug and put a chair up in the living room upstairs so that people will not just be staring at the floor instead they will be seeing the chair/rug and visualizing the space.

I am going to go a step farther since I dont want them thinking we just slapped down a rug to cover a defeat (which we are not doing). So Saturday after we get the carpet ordered for the stairs and hallway we are going to the furnature store.

I will be buying a new couch, chair with automan and a rug for the upstairs livingroom. After we sell the house if it will not all fit in my new apartment livingroom, I plan to put the chair and automan in my bedroom as a reading relaxing space just for me.

The couch is apartment sized so A. it will fit in my new apartment and B. it will make the house livingroom look Larger since the size is scaled back. I might even move one of the bookcases upstairs so that I can put some books up in the livingroom then I will have a reading area since I do not want to put a TV up there. If we had a flat screen that would be one story but I am not going to purchase that since I am a no TV person and XH cant buy the flatscreen he wants UNTIL the house sells and he wants to go BIG.

I got all three of the non-flat screen TVs in the divorce which I plan to sell two of them in a rummage sale leaving the third for DVDs and Wii, So I will not buy a flat screen TV just to sell this house. The Livingroom upstairs can be a reading area which will be staged so they can see that they will have room for a tv if they wanted.

The never ending to do list $$$$

May 18th, 2010 at 07:31 am

Talked to the realtor yesterday about the results of the open house this weekend.

The result - the realtor is sending her cleaning lady over to clean our floors. Everyone keeps saying the floors are dirty. Well I clean them it is just when the sun hits the floors they look streaky and dusty. Whatever, the cleaning lady is going to clean them and if they are unstreaky XH is suppose to ask what product she used on the floor and where she purchased it so we can start using that product.

Guess my swiffer wetjet is going to have to go away for now since it leaves streaks that bother others. Truthfully the streaks used to bug XH too but I have enough to deal with keeping the house going without worring about streaky floors that are just going to be walked over when DS and XH walk through with their shoes on to get a drink of water.

They also complained that the carpet on the stairs is dirty. We have desided just to replace it and then to carpet the basment hallway. We have lamentent in the hallway BUT due to code the basement floor slopes for drainage and of course the low spot is down the center of the hallway so unless we put a subfloor down the lament in the hall tends to give as you walk down it (since the middle of the hall is lower than the sides). People were starting to think structural issues when it is a code thing and well we should have put a subfloor down in the hall but at this point since people are complaining about the streaky lament we are going to carpet the hallway. Better to just put carpet down and fix the issue then pay for an inspector $$ to come in say oh they need a subfloor and it is good. Then still have to either put a subfloor down $$ or put an allowance for them hire someone to do it $$.

So this weekend we have to go look at carpet and arrange for a installation date. We also have to find out IF they put the floor molding back on after they are done or if we have to put it back on and just put it the correct height from the floor. Then we have to remove the carpet from the stairs and remove the lament from the hallway.

XH said to me that if the house does not sell in two weeks that he wants to go down in price and gave me a price....I hope he realizes what the list price he stated would actually bring in after the realtor fee and the deck allowance.

The funny thing is I am sure we will not have a offer in the next two weeks as we still need to finish the rock border, Mow the grass and weed and feed, stain the front porch, paint the upstairs walls, fill trim wood holes, and order and have the carpet installed, and XH is not doing any of that at this time....He is currently out Fishing with his buddy.

Another BIG issue we are having is that there is one house in the cul-de-sac that looks bad. The house is PAINTED a faded baby blue color and the rest of the cul-de-sac is nautrals in either vinyl or steal siding. They also have a ton of vehicles in there driveway, and they have at least two trailers (horse or motorcycle like transport type) parked on the grass to the side of the house and in the back yard. They have a blazer parked on the grass in the front yard. They do daycare so there are alot of cars coming and going to that house and because they are super busy their yard looks kind of Wild, they have a flower bed upfront of there house near the front sidewalk that is laid out like a vegtable garden.

Their yard just looks trashy and tacky....Sadly I think it is going to cost us some money to entice someone to overlook the eyesore.

Another Showing....

May 13th, 2010 at 12:51 pm

Really hoping it goes well, but I think it is going to Tank. I just feel bad telling people from Out of town that sorry the house is not presentable yet.

The house is kind of messy since tonight I need to pack to go out of town and we are in the process of painting. The paper and plastic is still hanging on the walls and the light covers are OFF of the wall XH painted today.

Yeah sounds bad, XH left the paper up for me to take down once the paint on the paper and tape was dry. Well after he left the house he got a call asking if someone could view it.

I hope at least he bothered to put away the dirty laundry....Oh gosh I think the laundry I was going to wash for the trip is hanging out in the upstairs hallway waiting for me to do something with. I doubt he put the stuff away since he left the house Before the call.

Also I need to email the realtor new pictures of the house since she has not been able to come out to take them, I also noticed the website is still listing our basement as having a 3/4 bath in the basement instead of a full and the allowance for the deck is not listed.

I think we should just unlist our house for a week or so until we are done with the painting and cleaning and yard work BUT then again Maybe someone could over look that stuff.


I want an offer so bad!

House price drop...Sort of; and house work

May 12th, 2010 at 06:44 am

So yesterday XH painted the stairwell and the banister. There are only two days left until we leave town for his work thing so once I mentioned that to him he realized today he has to do a bit more painting today then he got done yesterday.

The good news is the new paint in the stairwell and banster REALLY make the house look so much cleaner. We still have to paint more areas but I am hoping getting the really smuggy spots done will help with the (It needs to be cleaned comments). We had all the stuff me needed to do except for threee rolls of paper and we barrowed a painting paper roller from a coworker so the painting job so far has only cost $12. And IF we dont use all the rolls any unopenned rolls of paper can be returned.


Talked to the realtor last night, she hasn't heard back from the realtor who looked at our house on Saturday yet so I am thinking that means they are not going to be making an offer on the house. Knew we probubly should not have showed it before the stairwell got painted BUT they lived out of state.

The realtor called around and got three quotes on what a deck would cost, 2 said 4k one said 6k. Which is in line with what we had gotten for quotes back when we were looking to add a deck. So we went middle of the road and have now included a 5K allowance for the buyer to build a deck with. So technically the price has not gone down for the buyer but because 5K of the purchase price is being held for them to buy a deck with our profit went down by 5k.

Part of me would like to just pay for the deck and enjoy it now that summer is almost here until the house sells; BUT I dont want to spend 4K and then the buyer not like the deck because they would have chosen a different stain or composite decking or a much larger deck instead.


I am working on the rock border, yesterday I got the front of the house by the front door done, and I got the side of the garage done. Tonight I will be working on the side of the house by the front door. That way if you are in the front yard everywhere you see the rock border will be done. My back is so sore, but oh well Tonight is that last night I have to work on it because tomorrow night is the road trip.


Tonight is Subway so that I can keep working on the rock border and not stop to deal with dinner....$7.17.

On a kiddo note, since we have three bathrooms in our house I staged the two upstairs and cleaned them superwell and the towels are pinned in place so that they are perfect. I figure we can use the downstairs one and then that is two less things I need to be cleaning daily to keep the house show worthy. We told Little Love of my Life to only use the main bathroom IF it was an Emergency and he could not get to the bathroom down stairs.

Well last night as I am working in the rock garden what does he do? He calls me to come quick I need to look at the bathroom, After asking him a bunch of questions to figure out the EMERGENCY, I go inside. In the process of trying to get cleaned up enough to enter the house, I get MUD tracks all over the newly cleaned rugs by the front door. So I go to the bathroom and the Emergency is......... He has made me a smiley face out of WET Toliet Paper and put it on the Mirror in the Show Bathroom!

I also noticed this morning that he got the NEW bathroom rugs dirty in the process of making the smiley face because he did not take off his shoes before entering the house like I asked.

I am ready to sell the house so I can laugh and appreciate stuff like this instead of just thinking about the mess made.

I just opened my slush fund. It is a goal savings so the amount of my slush fund will automatically get transfer from checking into the slush fund. This is for those bills/events that are once or twice a year. It is with my brick and morter bank that has my checking account so as needed I can transfer the funds from savings to the checking account.

I would like to open a seperate savings account with ING for my car repair/replacement stuff but I am going to wait a few days to see if I can get one of the $25 bonus referal links. My car rarely goes into the shop for repairs and the replacement is a while off so I want to get higher interest on it and the three day transfer time is not a biggy.

So tired of house business....

May 10th, 2010 at 07:50 am

I took three days off last week so I could clean the house. I cleaned quite a bit but of course there is still more to do. I am wondering IF we should just move out so the house can be completely clean, and all I would have to do is once a week go over and touch up clean and mow the grass. The problem would be that it would be empty looking.

We need to get the following done ASAP.
#1. Paint the upper level.
#2. Clean the rocks in the driveway and move them to the rock border.
#3. Clean/Clear out garage.
#4. Fill Nail holes in the trim in basement.
#5. Clean clutter off entertainment center.

I was extremely frustrated because STBX was home the whole time last week that I took off from work and did not do anything to assist me. He was on facebook playing bejeweled blitz or watching movies. Sadly on Wednesday I thought we got our divorce papers BUT it was just the copies of everything that was prepared and a copy of the letter they sent to the court requesting it be filed and a copy of the final papers be returned to the lawyers office.

STBX did not go to work Friday because he was SO worked up about everything going on in his life and that the house is taking so long to sell he had to go see a pyschotrist. Then of course he got done with seeing her and instead of going to work he went to the BAR to relax. So I spent all night cleaning for the showing the next morning.

The next morning he woke me up at 745 am in a rage because I throw away his netflick envelope (Because I thought it was trash). That day he was driving 105 miles out of town to help a old friend move. So instead of making progress on the things that need to be addressed to sell our house he is just doing nothing and complaining.

Our realtor said people were saying our house was overpriced for not having a deck, and after doing some listing searches I think we are going to have to come down AND add an allowance for the deck. I think we are going to have to come down to the price I originally had in my mind to list it at.

I want the house sold so I can stop spending HOURS cleaning and keeping it clean. Every weekend I spend more time trying to get to look more clean, more organized. I am ready to relax.

My only complaint is that STBX is not paying anything towards any of the house bills, or repairs. So if I and my little boy move out so that the house stays cleaner then I am paying rent AND a house payment.

Even though STBX said he would watch DS this summer he is talking of moving in with a friend and staying on his couch (after house sells but before school starts). So not sure how that is going to work for daycare, I am going to need to work that out. Plus part of me is thinking maybe if STBX moved out now the house would stay cleaner as it is his stuff in the livingroom that is a cluttered mess.

Hopefully things will improve soon.

Basement Pictures...Help

May 4th, 2010 at 08:26 am

Okay here is the last photos of the listing.

They are the basement and backyard photos.

Family Room:

Yard Photo:

The yard is greener now, Yesterday I tested the sprinkler system and I programed the system. I am thinking though since we are retaking photos on friday I MIGHT go in and add another program to it so it is watering EVERY day until then so it greens up faster.

Yes this is all the photos of the basement even though there is a storage room behind the door you see to right of the TV, a Large Laundry Room a full bathroom and two bedrooms on this level.

If you were house looking would you want more photos or would that be photo overkill?

What do you suggest?

Inside Pictures....Please Comment on ways to improve

May 4th, 2010 at 08:08 am

This is the blurb from the ad...Skip to the bottom is that kind of thing does not interest you, but if you have questions about the pictures or lack of photos for some feature please refer to the listing.

NO SPECIAL ASSESSMENTS - SELLER PAID IN FULL!!! Keep your monthly payments lower! Ranch style home 2x6 const. built in 2006 in a quiet cul-de-sac with walkout lower level. 3 car heated garage, insulated, sheetrocked, hot & cold water & floor drain. This spacious home features an open floor plan with a large kitchen & oak cabinets. There is a total of three ovens (gas range with oven plus double wall ovens). The dining area has a patio sliding door to the large backyard with sprinkler system. Enjoy the hardwood laminate flooring & numerous recessed lights throughout this home. There are four bedrooms & three bathrooms including a master suite with private bathroom & walk-in closet. The lower level is totally finished with insulated walls, 6 panel solid oak doors, a large laundry room, 2 bedrooms, bathroom, family room & rec room. All of the bedrooms & garage are wired for internet, phone, cable plus a wireless router. There is a high efficiency furnace w/ central air & humidifier.

*** I desided to list them by level so due to photo number limits****


*** I have since cleaned all clutter off of counters except the Kitchenaid Mixture in the corner and the countertops are being replaced.


Livingroom (two pictures I guess to picture size)

Master bedroom

* Yes those totes of clothes are still there and NEED to be taken care of before new pictures friday.

This is the main floor, bottom floor pictures to follow. Do you have any staging ideas or cleaning suggestions, also what do you feel about the lack of photos of walkin closet or bathroom for the master or lack of photos for the second bedroom and main bathroom. If you were a buyer would you want to see these things?

Thank you for all your help.

Yesterday Sucked, but hopefully a turn around soon..

May 4th, 2010 at 07:47 am

Yesterday STBX went to look for the siding and he was unable to just go in and order it or buy it (stock on hand) as it is no longer being made.

The siding guy suggested another place to locate the siding. So the search continues for either someone who has stock on hand or a really close match by a different company.

If that does not work out they are starting to do two tone siding here. Basically one color on the bottom 3 or 4 feet then one row of white or a accent color then a different color above. We could do this and I think this would be some very nice curb appeal. I would like to do a slightly darker color to the bottom and the white accent color leaving the current color on the top and the extra siding removed from the bottom could be stored for future repairs. BUT for now we are going to look for 2 pieces that are what we have or VERY VERY close or just leave it and if the buyer wants to negotiate that into the offer so be it.


I was super busy yesterday and did not get my papers turned in, actually after all the bad things that happened I did not want to. Sometimes when bad things keep happening it is best not to add to it.


I called the realtor yesterday to bring up the fact she listed our house as having a 3/4 bath in the basement instead of a full. We then talked about the outcome of the open house.

Basically the big things were that people thought it needed to be cleaned. The house was really clean for the open house (except the painting supplies in the laundry room, the garage and the totes of STBX clothes in the Master that are ozzing all over.)So not sure unless they are talking scuffs on the walls that need to be painted. So we may end up painting. I also NEED to take more things to the storage unit, basically things from the garage. Need to have it sparkle.

Also they said that they thought it was overpriced for not having a deck so we are doing a little research into deck prices and going to do a allowance. We are not going to pay the cost of a deck then have them complain it is too small or the wrong material etc...Just doing an allowance.

Wednesday the countertops are being installed and that might have been an issue also that they just could not visiualize the new counters.

Anyway on Friday the realtor is going to do another walk through and hopefully a little staging and LOOK for issues to address, we will discuss and deside on the allowance for the deck. We are also at that time going to take NEW pictures for the website NEW curb appeal and more rooms.

Hopefully we can plan another open house for NEXT weekend.


Shopping, since the countertops are going in tomorrow today STBX is disconnecting the sink. So dinner tonight is Subway and I will be buying some new shower curtains and rugs trying to get a more upscale image for the pictures on Friday. I will also be buying the planters for the front porch and in front of the garage.


Okay going to post the listing phots in a follow up post so I can get suggestions?

As Requested Photos of Front of House.

May 3rd, 2010 at 07:48 am

Here is a picture of the front of our house.

I would love some suggestions on some curb appeal.

Not sure how much you can see but I have put down black rubber edging that starts about 18 inches in front of where the cement walkway meets the front step, curving it around the front porch then around the front window then around the side, back, other side and to the side of the garage going to 18 inches infront of the garage where the driveway is.

I plan to keep filling it with river rock (easier to mow if you do not have to go right up to the house).

I had pansies planted by the front steps and there are Blocks holding down the black film next to the porch (rocks soon?) then infront of the window are two rose bushes and tiger lilies.

The pansies are starting to grow tiny leaves (seeds from last years plants), and the tiger lilies are growing. Not sure if the rose plants made it as I do not see any green growth YET.

The grass is starting to green in patches NOW (this is the picture from our listing April 4th- see snow on grass).

There is some oil stain infront of the single garage BUT I did clean it since this picture, I do need to go over it some more BUT it is better.

Our lot line in front is two sidewalk squares over from the right or three of the lines (between the two mail boxes) and would go in the direction of that first big Pine you see in the rear right of the background. Now our backyard does not go that far back but I wanted to to give you a line to visualize our front yard.

I have removed the stain on the porch and need to restain it as the area that had knots in the wood the stain color lifted. (To Do List)

We are in Zone 5 for planting if your wondering.

What do you think??

May 1st

May 1st, 2010 at 09:40 am

Today I am working, it is my weekend to work this month.

I was paid yesterday since the first fell on a Saturday. Yesterday Night a friend of STBX came over to look at our siding.

He recomfermed what I thought. That to replace the side siding piece all the pieces come down because it goes on first.

But because the melting to the side piece is VERY minor, we could get by without replacing it and either someone will not notice it or it will be so small that it is no big deal.

On Monday STBX needs to run down to the place that sold our siding to the contractor and pick up two pieces and the friend will replace them for $20.

His friend also mentioned that they make a paint for siding so if it gets marked up you can paint it. STBX hit the side of the house with a bobcat and so a piece has black marks on it. I am going to try to get the mark out with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser (I LOVE THEM) and if that does not work he will pick up a bit of the paint to fix that when he gets the siding on Monday.

Hopefully the $20+ ??? Supplies fix for the siding will help create more interest in our property. I really do not want to do MUCH more to fix up the house because that is one of the reasons we are selling it, so many to do items, but I think I might ask our realtor what we should do to improve our showings.

The morning gets BETTER.

April 28th, 2010 at 12:54 pm

I got the first draft of my divorce documents.

I say first draft because I needed to make a few changes, I am having the STBX look them over to make sure there is nothing in them he wants changed.

One big point was they messed up the Child Support Amount. I was like WOW when I saw the amount, but then I turned the page and was like WTF when I saw what they had as his per month net pay.

I went to the states website and ran the correct numbers. The amount is the exact same as what StepDaughter#2 Mother gets. The original number was almost double that amount. I told STBX the amount correct amount and of course he flipped out.

I told him we have options, I could either pay him for watching our son this summmer like I originally said I would, and since it is basically double dipping having him pay for Child Support AND half the household bills until he moves we could make an arrangement of one applying to the other. Also I said I am not sure that the CS is automatic or if we have to contact them, and They are always so slow anyway...If we dont do anything it might not happen until School starts (his income jumps once school starts). That calmed him down.

I want the paperwork done, I have no problem letting him mooch off me until School starts because it is best for Our little boy to get to spend time with his daddy and it does help me. Basically I look at it like hiring a nanny.

Man that would be AWESOME if we could get this all ironed out today and emailed back to the lawyer.

I am reading the documents and I think in our state since it is uncontested all that has to be done after it is signed is for it to be entered into record. That would be FREAKEN awesome if this could be done FAST!

Great Morning....

April 28th, 2010 at 08:26 am

Today I stepped on the scale and stood there, sent a little prayer up above. Yeah when weight loss means job security for you and your son you bother god with little things like weight loss.

I looked down and 173.8 Wahoooo that is .8 above what I was when I was measured for work in Febrary. I am down 7.4 pounds since Friday, I also know this is not just water weight as I am always feel it when I lose weight in my back by my ribs.

I stepped off the scale and redid it because I wanted to MAKE Sure. Since I am .8 from my first goal, I am not sure if my next goal will be weight loss, inch loss, or body fat percentage loss. If we do not get weighed/taped at work this weekend than come monday morning I will get taped so that I can figure out what the next goal is.

Last night I Purchased another box of benefiber drink mix, this I think is so much better than pushing down fiber pills as #1 is helps with the water consummed, and #2 I hate pushing down fiber pills. I did not have a coupon for the benefiber, I lost my coupon organizers and could not find anything online. I am spending between $2 and $2.33 without coupon per day on benefiber to loss this weight. BUT since I lost 2 pounds yesterday SOOOO worth the $1 a pound.

I was able to find some coupons online after I got home from the purchase and I have two computer so I was able to print 4. My STBX has two computer that work, so I am hoping he will get the second one (needs a moniter) set up and I might be able to get four more coupons. One coupon lasts for 3 days worth of diet.

I was talking with a coworker, she is having someone remove some river rock from her yard, That person is also removing some from another persons home.

Well I am going to get the rock from BOTH for free and the person is delivering it to my driveway, all I have to do is spray it down with water to remove the dirt that has attached to the rock and I can put it into my empty rock gardens.

If I bought this at the store it would have been $2.97 per bag! Not sure how much rock it will end up being but more than one bag full. I hope to have enough to finish the side of the garage and the front of the house.

The same coworker who is having the rock removed so she can put in a flower bed gets the newspaper but does not use coupons. She agreed to bring them to me.

Wahoo What a good day.

Spending and life Update including 529 Account.

April 26th, 2010 at 10:40 am

On Friday I had that light bulb moment....

Everytime I have successfully lost weight and kept it off for a while I have
#1 took a diet pill
#2 Counted Calories
#3 drank at least 8 glasses of water a day.

Well Friday I went to the store and picked up some SlimQuick. I am liking it so far. I really like how I feel less tired. I was looking through the information and I noticed the appitite supressent is a differnet/additional product. So I went back to the store to pick some up since I have that problem.

Well Wal-Mart did not have it BUT CVS did. CVS had a label on another SlimQuick product that said in small print ALL slimquick Product. The Label/Tag was Buy one get one 50%. So when it did not ring up that way I asked and after a little wait I got my 50% off.

I am down 2.4 pounds since starting the pills and appetite supressent. I am down 3.4 pounds since Friday Morning!!!

The appetite supressent drink mix Tastes NASTY!!! No wonder it is everywhere on EBAY. I have decided to use it once a day only as the pre dinner item because I get SO hungery then I could eat a horse. This means I will have enough for 27 days. Hopefully by then my stomich will shrink and I will not be as hungry. So I will not have to buy more.

I need to buy more of the pills though. I will be checking for coupons and sale prices. I just bought the first bottle on Friday so I have some time before I need to buy more I just want to get it purchused before I run out so I can save $$$.


I have been drinking my 8 glasses of water a day, actually I am at 10-11 so I am in the bathroom like a pregnant lady.


Counting calories...Yep I am doing it. I am eatting the same thing for breakfast everyday, then lunch is soup, then dinner is a meal that changes. By repeating the breakfast, and lunch it makes it easier to do the calories....You just figure it out once and you are good.

Today the countertop people called, so hopefully we should be getting it installed this week. Tomorrow the guy is installing the door upstairs.

This means that all I have to finish on the house is staining the front steps...Oh it snow this morning. So I need to wait now. Got to love the weather.

I want to pick up some rocks for around the house. It will depend on how long it takes to sell the house but I would like to atleast pick up enough for the front of the house and the side by the garage.

My STBX is freaking out about the house not selling. Now he has forgotten that the Realtor said most houses are selling in 80 days and instead has in his head that she promised before the end of April (she said she hoped the Tax credit might prompt an FAST sell).

We have a Open House last night and 10 couples came to see the house. I bought my son new shoes since the seams at the toes of his other were torn. $25 total after tax, I could have gotten cheaper if I would have went to the mall or Wal-MArt but he Loved these since they are like his Daddy's.

No news on the Divorce Front...Well Actually last Thursday I sent back the form that says I agree to the fees. So hopefully that will be done soon. My STBX is running up his Credit Card...He is charging Alcohol and tabacco and getting cash advances to buy those things. He is spending an average of $20 a day. I should just not worry about it BUT part of me worries that at the last minute I am going to have to deal with it.

Today the disk drive on his laptop is stuck. He has two desktops, one that works and one that needs repairs. So his answer to the laptop is he plans to go to Wal-MArt and buy a new one with his credit card and throw the old (1.5 years old - desert conditions) across the room.

Whatever.......I really need to not worry about his issues BUT I am playing the What if game. What IF he doesn't sign the papers and wants me to pay off half his credit card bill. (In his Name Only and Charging Nothing of value.)
I stopped putting money into the 529 account for me son. I then changed the deposit allication for new deposits. WHY because once we sell the house and deposit the sales from the house It will be invested as a seperate investment fund, that way the money from US is seperate from MY $. Once the House $ is deposited I will then change the allication back to the prior funds and I will put new MY $ deposits into the other fund.

That way IF something happens and I need to use MY money for Me for College it is seperate from the Joint $ for Little Boy. I have also desided for the time being that I am not going to put anymore money into the college fund. I have a option that might open up in the future to finish funding it so for now I will use the money for other goals.

Hard Work, Free DoorBell, Being a Kid

April 19th, 2010 at 07:13 am

This weekend I worked my tail off on Friday. Of course I still need to seal the wood of the front porch.

I might do that tonight. I needed to let the wood dry out after washing it (twice) and sanding it. Yesterday I noticed dirty shoe prints on the deck after the wash job so I will need to sweep/sand those off (no water) then seal the deck.

I think the reason the stain/seal was not lasting was in years past I was rushing the stain/seal after the cleaning off of the old product and the first year I think the problem was we did not clean the wood to make sure there was not any kind of product on it.


After cleaning the front porch I painted the trim around the doors; it looks real nice. We went out to buy a new door bell. Once we got home we noticed the holes in the siding from the old bell were spaced farther apart then the new bell. So went to a different store and same deal. Which means we had to go back to the overpriced place that we picked our lights etc out back in Fall 2006. We closed on our house in Feb 2007. Not sure when the light bell got installed so the doorbell is a little over 3 years old. It still works it is just that the button has a hole in it like the plastic just disinigrated. Since it looked terrible we wanted to get it fixed as it is a eye sore upon entering the house.

I went into the store and explained that we closed on our house in Feb 2007 and was wonder what there warrenty was on the door bells. We explained how it seemed like the door bell button just disinigrated. I was not expecting anything but figured I would try. The floor guy went to ask the big boss and said before leaving to ask her that usually it is a year warrenty but he might be able to do a 30% discount. He came back after a while and said that they would give us the replacement FREE but they needed the old bell.

So we drove home took the door bell off and my son and I returned to the store to get the new one. We had a white door bell that actually looked a little cream now BUT they were out even the display model was gone so we ended up with a silver one. Oh well FREE is FREE and I think the bling of the silver adds a nice touch to our front door which feels a little plain at this time. All in all we probubly spent $.50 in gas and got a FREE doorbell. Now I just have to return the door bell we had originally bought at a hardware store. Regular price of door bell $19.97 @ overpriced lighting store which we got for free because we asked about a warrenty.

This Saturday we had one showing. I think the STBX is getting nervous as time goes on because I think he is secretly wishing that it will sell in April because then he can move out of state faster. The school he wants to attend keeps asking if he wants to start sooner because they have openings. He told me they say it is easier to get a earlier date and not a later date so he is locked into August BUT if we sell the house earlier he could move earlier. STBX promised to watch DS this summer but I have a feeling I am going to be putting him into daycare this summer. I cant really blame him for wanting to start early after all if he does then he does not have to get an apartment here if we sell before August. It just sucks because as usual I am the one having to scrabble to make everything work.

Today we have two showings.

I guess I do not have a preferance when it comes to selling the house. When we sell I will move into an apartment and my housing expenses will go down by about $600 per month. When we sell STBX will move out of state and depending on when that happens then come summer I will need to pay for fulltime summer daycare $500+ per month which is a $335 increase since right now my afternoon care cost is $165. Also once he moves our electric will go down because he runs his computer and all his electronics 24/7 and even forgets to turn off the TV.

I think my food costs will go down also since while he was gone we averaged $50 a week including resterants and now we are averaging $150 in groceries alone.

So if you do the math it is still cheaper and the stress of everything will be less, I just wish that my little boy could have a fun free carefree summer. I think I am going to be enrolling him in the summer school program 8am-12noon (FREE) then figure out a afterschool program for the rest of the day. It is three weeks a month for June and July so I could actaully take vacation the other week. Then I think I could enroll him in the all day August program at the place he goes to now afterschool.

This just makes me a little sad as I really just wanted my little boy to get a summer of going to bed late, sleeping in late, riding his bike, playing with kids and not having to be stuck in a classroom from 8am-noon.

I need to start clearing out the storage unit, since we have desided what STBX wants as his property. Maybe I can talk to my grandmother about a rummage sale in May. I wonder if there is time for a small one this Weekend at her house since we have the open house this weekend.

Projected Weekend Spending

April 16th, 2010 at 09:33 am

This weekend I plan on tackling some to do items.

I was thinking I needed to get out more, well I meant with people as I have been a little hermit like in my attempt to limit daycare costs since my son was born over 6 years ago. But this weekend I will get out more it is just going to be outside the house instead of indoor to do items.

My To Do List

Post Signs on the Counter and door opening saying that they will be professionally installed by the 25th if not earlier. - No cost signs are Done just need to be hung

Remove the stain from the Front porch - Already have product (Might have to buy a scrub brush and gloves $5) (DONE - NO COST)
Clean the frames of the exterior doors - Have Scraper and sander. (DONE - NO COST)
Clear Coat the front porch - Have product (Might have to buy a paint brush $5)
Prime Entry Doors - Have Product (Might Have to buy a Brush $5)(skipped - NO COST)
Paint Entry Doors - Have Product (Might Have to buy a brush $5)(DONE - NO COST)
BUY and install new Door Bell Button - (DONE - NO COST)
Hang Hose Reel (DONE - NO COST)
Rake Yard
Buy Rocks for Rock Boarder - $2.99 plus per bag
Grass Seed on Sprinkler Lines/overseed - $35 per bag
Bend Metal Stakes to hold edging
Caulk Windows - Have Product
Spray/Wash Driveway - Have Product (Might have to buy a Brush $5)(DONE - NO COST)
Stack Bricks holding down edging to Garage

The Big expenses will be the Rocks at $2.99 a bag and the huge bag of grass seed that is $35 and possibly the door bell button.

I wish I could plant some flowers/plants to increase curb appeal BUT the risk of frost is here until the 20th of May so need to hold off even though I really wish I could add some color.

****I update the list with the done items, NO cost at all but not everything got done. Just felt relaxing on Sat & Sun.

Emergency FUND

April 15th, 2010 at 10:40 am

Well I had question marks next the the Emergency Fund instead of amounts because I did not know what to put there.

If we cant sell and we need to pay for the house then it is $2360.00 a month. If we sell and we rent an apartment it will be less.

I have desided to list the emergency fund as if I will pay for the house payment and then if it sells I will redo the amounts to match my NEW expenses.

3MTH is 7,080.
6MTH is 14,160
9MTH is 21,240
12MTH is 28,320

*** Today is payday, I NEED to balance my checkbook and see what I have to as a ballpark for EF. It will just be a ballpark since until the divorce is final the STBX could turn around and say he wants more.

****** Got a email back from the lawyer and it said that she wanted me to know that unforquently she is super busy with court cases this week she is not going to be able to get to my paperwork until next week. Hurry Up and wait (I am used to this so no biggy). So now I will sit here and wonder if the paperwork gets done next week and mailed out and signed and returned how long is the process from then on? I should have probubly just got some guts and sat down with the STBX last week but I think it would have been a bit much for both me and STBX.

Emailed the information and paid part of the bill

April 15th, 2010 at 09:52 am

Yesterday I sat down with STBX and we went over the list of marital assests that I made.

Also we answered the questions on the parenting plan guidance, at least I hope we answered them well enough.

He agreed to still watch our son this summer. I offered to pay him, which he turned down. He asked when I wanted him to move out, to which I brought up him just moving into the basement.

So yesterday we bought a new mattress and box spring for our son. We set it up on a frame and put it in the basement, it is what STBX will sleep on until he moves out of state for school or we sell the house which ever comes sooner. Once the house sells we will discard the 15-17 yearold mattress that is on my sons bed and he will get the new one. Until then we will keep the extra furnature to fill up the house.

The bed in the extra room makes the house more inviting instead of an empty room it is now a room with furnature to see what size it is.

The good thing about him in the basement is that it means our son will be able to just be a kid this summer with no real bed time and waking up when he wants to. Also he can continue to drop our son off at school.

I am thinking if we still have not sold the house when our divorce is final I might go buy the couch and automan I want for my new apartment and put it upstairs in the livingroom to help fill out the house better.

Since we completed the papers we have been getting along real well. When he raises his voice about something I dont take it personal anymore. I remind myself there are a few benefits to putting up with it.

He has also been better, instead of yelling every hour or so about something minor he is maybe yelling once or twice a day.

Yesterday we even went out for lunch and he paid. It was nice. For once I was just living life instead of hating him because I was allowing him to treat me badly and thinking I had no way out.


This morning I re did the marital list so that it was grouped into things like accounts, then the house, then into his and then mine. I hope this makes it easier to understand.

I then called the laywers office and got the info to email the lawyer and paid the first part so they can do up the paperwork.

I asked how long it normally takes, did not get a real answer. If nothing needs to be changed and all parties still agree it goes rather quickly. WHAT is Quickly?

Today the 15th of April I submitted the information to the lawyer with a partial payment, lets see what quickly is....

Taking tomorrow off!

April 13th, 2010 at 11:19 am

Tomorrow I am planning on breaking out the paperwork.

I will be sitting down with STBX and completeing the Marital Assets list and the parenting plan.

At least I hope it gets done, hopefully STBX is not too much in shock that I actually am taking the bull by the horns and going through with a DIVORCE.

I am a little nervous, hope it all goes well.

I need to get my little guy a hair cut. The last hair cut was right before STBX came home the 29th of January. He has needed one for a while but STBX keeps saying he will take little guy in for a haircut when he gets one. I think he MIGHT be getting a haircut for work two weeks from now but maybe not. I am tired of waiting so I will take little guy in for a hair cut after work tonight.

Truthfully STBX hair is really short as he buzzed it right before coming home in January so he could probubly just take the trimmer to the back of his neck and right around his ears and be good (Little guy- no way).

Got an Email from an old friend, guess he is getting out of the Army in like 4 months. He has a Medical Review Board coming up. It is too bad as he only has 9 or 10 years based on his enlistment date and not all of those are Active as he was in the Reserves for a while; so he is short of the 15 needed for a Early Medical Retirement. Hopefully since it is service related he will at least get VA disability payments. I would have liked to hear more and cheer him on but his wife is TOTALLY PSYCHO so I will probubly not hear from him again.

Hopefully the weather will be nice tomorrow after I am done with the paperwork, I hope to get outside and rake the lawn. It is still early so I dont want to turn on the sprinkler system, but I sure wish our grass was greener to help sell the house faster.

Crazy Busy!!

April 12th, 2010 at 01:09 pm

Today is crazy, it is one disaster after another. I am finally taking a break (for long enough to write).

Last night we had a showing, my STBX said we would grill brats for dinner. I was hungry before I got home, so once I got home I raided the leftovers to tide me over until the LITE dinner of brats.

My STBX waits until he has only enough time for him to cook the brats and for us to hit the door eatting on the run. Well guess what we are out of gas. We have two tanks so he must have used a ton of gas the two weeks he was home last summer. He through a hissy fit about it.

I cant wait to be away from his drama.


While we were killing time during the showing we ordered the countertops for the kitchen, of course STBX askes "didnt you/we do this already" The measurements where only taken Monday when have I had any time I think to myself?


Today is his first day back at work (part time 5p-9p) after not working since Jan 29th. He is going to be difficult to deal with after he gets off work tonight.


Today he called and well he complained about the realtor again. He is so totally out of reality. He is upset because he does not think I under stand his complaints. Which I do not understand them. We are with one realtor who works at a company. Well most of our viewings are from a different reality company, so he thinks all our realtor did was put the house for listing on five different websites and a TV Show and that she is doing nothing.

He thinks we should have a ton of our company realtors pushing the house. ?????

I am finally said okay I hear you but I disagree. "Back in 2005 we were looking at houses in the 110K-115K range". "The realtor took us to houses in the 110K-115K range, maybe the other realtors do not have clients that are looking at houses that are in the 214,900 price range. Why if the client is looking for 150K would the realtor bring them to our house?" Of course then it made sense, but sometimes I really wonder why it is so hard to him to grasp how things work.

Also I told him we need to call the realtor with the names of who came to see the house so she can follow up with the realtor and he says why should we "she isn't doing anything"

The point of the follow up is so we can get a report of how the visit went and if there where any questions the visiting realtor has they can be answered by our realtor of course I have already explained this to him BUT he must have playing Magic the Gathering or XBOX 360 or playing on his computer when I told him this the first time because of course he was irrate when I asked if he had written the time and date on the back of the cards of the realtor cards that came during the day.

DRAMA DRAMA DRAMA, so ready for the drama to be over.

Not Showing the house on purpose today!

April 10th, 2010 at 07:38 am

Okay I should clearify, we are not going to be showing the house after 4pm today. So far I dont think we had any calls for showing today BUT yesterday my DH was whining and moaning about not being able to grill (he like to use a smoker) so it is an long process. We cant start the smoker going and then just leave a live fire if someone wants to see the house.

Basically if we dont show it after 4pm he could maybe BBQ that evening. I am thinking IF he wants to sell the house as quickly and as badly as he does than he should be willing to give up grilling IF need be but whatever.

But I said OKAY, why because yesterday I put in a 14 hour day working until 10pm, returned today to start work at 7am and will need to work sunday at 7am. So tonight when I get off work around 4pm I want to go curl up in bed and sleep. No showings after 4pm means I can go home and catchup on sleep.

Next weekend neither of us work so if people want to see the house; no big deal. The following week we have to go out of town for the weekend, so people can see the house. The following weekend is another busy work weekend for me....I think this will be a no show after 4pm Sat & Sun so I can sleep and DH can grill.

If DH was not such a whinner I would say chill over the grilling thing and show the house (I could visit my grandmothers house and sleep there).

Technically the house has only been listed since Wednesday but I was ready for it to be sold months ago. I hope it sells fast!!!

Running Numbers

April 8th, 2010 at 06:46 am

I am running numbers, and my husbands take home should be $672.20 per month after taxes and taking out Child Support for his two other children. This seems low BUT that is 8K a year so more than poverty level. (It will go up by close to 3K per month once certain non-taxable income start kicking in).

I am not sure how to have the lawyer address the housing situation. YES I want stop living with him ASAP but until we sell the house technically it is half his. It would be much easier if he would just move and answer one of those roomate wanted ads or get an effecentcy appartment which in our area are $240-$365 per month. But I am not sure what he will want to do, who knows it could take months for it to be finalized and then renting for one month is silly (unless we have the house already sold).

Also Part of the $ above is money I will be paying him this summer to watch our child (since he will only be working 5p-9p Mon-Fri. It would be easier to continue the daycare situation if we are sharing the house because then our son could sleep in and just be a kid (until the house sells).

I plan on sitting down with him this coming Tuesday. I am going to say we need to come up with an agreement since he is moving out of state in August for school. Even though we have been functioning like roommates for years, it will still be a surprize I think.

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